Shameful and embarrassing story from this weekend I thought…


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+1303 – Played 18 with my two buddies this week and had something happen that I feel truly awful about. While on the practice green I’m watching the group ahead of us tee off from the tips, it’s a 5some and the are horrible. Most of them are on their 3rd shots and haven’t gotten past the forward tees. As someone who hates slow golfers and bad etiquette my blood was starting to boil. We finally hit our tee shots and wait probably another 10 minutes for them to clear the green. At this point me and my friends have already begun talking shit about them, saying all sorts of nasty comments. While waiting on the tee box for #2 which is a par 3 we see the ranger driving up to talk to them. We figured he would give them a warning or tell them to let faster groups play through. Nope, he gives them a big wave and high fives one of the guys. After watching this group take about 20 strokes each to finish the par 3 I had enough and told my friends im going to ask/demand to play through. As we drive up to the 3rd tee box the group is in the fairway near the forward tees again. I drop my buddy off at the box and go to speak with the group. As im driving up one of them starts walking towards me. I ask if we can play through and he says yes, and then I passively aggressively tell him that it’s bad etiquette to hold up the course and if you have open holes in front of you, you need to skip and move up. Again he apologizes and we went back and tee’d off. As we are driving past them I wave and say thank you……then I noticed that it was a group of adults with special needs. I’ve never felt like such a piece of shit in my life, especially since I have a newphew with autism and have worked in the field for almost 15 years. We all truly felt terrible, and I still feel like a piece of shit.

2022-06-23 18:20:33

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40 Comments

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  1. An engineer, a priest, and a doctor are trying to enjoy a round of golf. Ahead of them is a group playing so slowly that in frustration the three ask the ranger for an explanation.

    “That’s a group of blind firefighters,” they are told. “They lost their sight saving our clubhouse last year, so we let them play for free.”

    The priest says, “I will say a prayer for them tonight.”

    The doctor says, “Let me ask my ophthalmologist colleagues if anything can be done for them.”

    And the engineer says, “Why can’t they play at night?”

  2. Why would they be teeing off from the tips tho? Whoever was with them should have had them tee off from a forward tee still. Not absolving you of anything but it is weird they were going from the tips.

  3. There’s not really any way you could’ve known without being up close and slow play irritates the most patient of people. To me it shows your true character in the way you feel remorseful – there are many way shittier people who would still be mad and calling them “retards” and shit like that. Don’t beat yourself up about it and maybe just use this moment to help remind yourself in any instance you feel so upset that you probably don’t understand the entire story based on what you’re seeing at face value.

  4. Why did you feel you should tell them they should let people play through when they just agreed to let you play through? It almost seems like your anger was to thr point that yiu wanted to start an argument.

  5. Great example for the sub of why leading with compassion in these situations is always the way to go.

  6. nothing wrong with asking to play through a slow group – but a good lesson that you don’t have to be a dick about it

  7. I think this is a good lesson in the principle of “You never know what someone is going through, so default to being kind.”

    Kudos to you for recognizing it, calling yourself out and committing to be better.

  8. All of the commenters talking about they should be playing from the forward tees are killing me. Everyone doesn’t know the golfing culture. It is also not their responsibility to know in order to play as a beginner. It makes perfect sense to me that special needs adults might play from the tips given that plenty of beginners do that because they do not know.

  9. Damn, that’s the kind of mistake that would haunt me in the middle of the night a decade later.
    Thanks for sharing your shame, I will endeavour to not repeat it!

  10. Be happy you learned a lesson. A lot of folks would have learned nothing from this experience.

  11. I have an uncle with very similar behaviors. Since childhood we have called him Uncle butthead.

  12. Hey, shit happens. Remember – you can only make your choices based on the information you have with you at the time. Right?

    Also, the ranger could have easily communicated that with you.

  13. Doesn’t matter if they’re special needs you don’t have to be a POS behind their back. Every golfer has to start somewhere.

  14. LOL- Well now you know. I’m not on the course to make enemies. If someone is slow, I will ask to play through or just skip them. No shitty comments, no nothing, its not my job to explain the history of golf course ettiquate etc, I’m out there to play, not get into a pissing match or talk shit to people. Hope you take this lesson off the course with you OP, you never know what someone is going through so don’t rush to judgement just because they slighted you or inconvenienced you or even said something nasty to you.

  15. I mean you couldn’t have known. I get feeling terrible about it once you found out in hindsight, but don’t beat yourself up about it.

  16. He already said yes. But yet you felt the need to go in more. Def deserved that embarrassment.